Spiral Journal Spread 11: For Aunt Livy
This was a totally different page until I hated it and then covered it up and started all over again. Ever have that happen to you? I think it's a good metaphor for life, too, and reminds me of something a friend posted on her Facebook page: "Lesson from your dog: no matter what life brings you, kick some grass over that sh*# and move on." After I did that, this spread ended up becoming a tribute to my Aunt Livy. I remember as we were leaving the funeral last week, my husband casually threw out, "and the world keeps spinning and the sun keeps rising..." despite the heartbreak.
Once I covered up the first go 'round, I looked at the messy paper on my desk, decided to trace a stencil over it, and voila!, problem fixed! My thanks to Roben-Marie for reminding me that those under papers come in really handy. Since they had a lot of spray ink overage on them, I did have to spray a fixative on the page to keep it from smearing before I could varnish it and write on it. I'm loving using the matte varnish technique Orly taught me on my pages. It definitely makes them so much easier to write on. Each of the "rays" has little words about Aunt Livy and experiences we've shared with her.
I still have my moments of Auny Livy inspired tears, but I'm doing better. My Livvie is still struggling though. Every night I tuck her in to bed, the tears start coming again, and she asks me questions about Aunt Livy's death or death and dying in general. "Why does everything good have to end?" "Will my heart ever stop hurting?" and the biggee, which I think is the crux of it all, "Are you and Daddy going to die, Mama?" I think as a parent, the hardest thing about losing a very close family member is helping your kids navigate their grief. My heart breaks for my little Livvie. Have you had experiences with this?